By Saundra Bunton
In the movie Kung Fu Panda, the wise elder Oogway reminds the sensei that we must relinquish the illusion of control. “Yes,” he says, “you can control where to plant the seeds. But no matter how badly you want this tree to be an apple tree, or a pear tree, it will never grow into anything but a peach tree. It can only be what it is.”
I was not expecting such wisdom to attack me in the middle of a children’s cartoon movie, but I was delightfully impressed by the wisdom displayed in the movie, particularly in the scene quoted above. Here is a lesson, I thought, that most adults have a hard time understanding or digesting on a regular basis. How many problems could we solve in this world if people truly understood that “it can only be what it is.”
In order to survive in this world we have to have relationships with other people, and I don’t just mean romantic relationships either. We have to speak to our boss at work and deal with the people who collect tickets on the train. We sometimes have to ask questions at the supermarket and we have to be prepared to interact with the cashiers. We cannot get through an entire day without speaking to or dealing with another person in some capacity and we certainly cannot determine who that person will be.
What we can determine is who that person will meet when you interact with them. What person are you going to be? Are you determined to remain steadfast or are you going to allow them to affect your reality?
The truth is, you cannot force another person to cosign your reality and you cannot make them be who you want them to be. But you can choose to be strong enough in your convictions that they cannot negatively influence you without your permission.
The people around us can only be who they are, who they have chosen to be. It is up to us to choose who it is we want to be.
Snt Embahra
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